Week No. 18 - It's A Girl!

I can't believe it's a girl...

So I will be honest and admit that I cried for two days when I found out it was a girl. Letting go of Shepard's pregnancy has been much harder than I ever imagined, and somehow, I thought having another boy would fix all of that. Wake up call.... nothing will ever "fix" it. Nothing, no-one will ever replace him. So what does it really matter if the next baby is a boy or girl? It doesn't.

Estil says emotionally, it might be easier, expecting a little girl. This might allow me to separate this pregnancy from Shepard's a bit more and eventually  give this baby the attention, love and bonding she deserves. Just like Shepard got. At first, I "ya-yah"ed him and didn't think what he said had any merit. But now, having been able to process this for a little over a week... I think he might be right. This weekend I was searching for new nursery ideas, thinking about the different colors I might use this time. We have been picking out names and we finally came up with one we are both really excited about. It feels really good.

Now that is not to say that I haven't cried, two, three or 10 times this last week thinking about Shepard, or going through his stuff. But it is emotional progress. That I am sure of, because I am truly happy. I have my moments of grief, and my heart will always ache for Shep. But in this moment, in this pregnancy, I am happy and excited to meet this baby.

SO! Here is Week No. 18 stats :)

Total weight gain: 2 lb.

Maternity clothes: None yet!

Stretch marks: Nope.

Sleep: sleeping ok. Can't sleep on my back anymore and my hips throb throughout the night.

Best moment of this week: Finding a name that both of us really like.

Miss anything: alcohol, heavy weights, and my smaller boobs!

Movement: becoming pretty regular and stronger now!

Food cravings: nothing in particular.

Anything making you queasy or sick: Nope!

Have you started to show yet: oh Yes!

Gender: Girl!

Labor signs: Nope.

Belly button in or out: In… sorta 

Wedding rings on or off: On.

Happy or moody most of the time: Happy!

Looking forward to: the "big" ultrasound next week to determine the umbilical cord is right where it should be, so we can rest assured this baby won't have the risk Shepard had.

And just for fun, here is me with Shepard at 18 weeks, and today with baby girl :)

Week No. 16 - weight gain and exercise

Week 16 - Finally! I am starting to look a little pregnant. It's amazing how much better this makes me feel. Like it's not all in my head. Any of the minor symptoms I had in the first trimester are completely gone. However I think I have grown yet another cup size in the last week.

These girls are becoming too much to handle! And this is before my milk comes in?! Oy vey!

During my pregnancy with Shepard, I was so impressed with how my body changed and compromised to make room for my little man. This time around, I am even more amazed at how my body has adjusted to these dramatic changes in such a short period of time. It is amazing no matter how long time passes between each pregnancy, but considering I conceived this baby only 10 weeks after giving birth to Shepard.... it truly is a gift to be a woman.

Here is me at 4 weeks with Shepard, and with this baby.

Here I am at 16 weeks with Shepard, and again me this week with this baby.

6 pounds gained          vs.       1 pound gained

My organs are pushing out much faster this time. The most interesting part I have found so far, is that I have only gained 1 pound in this pregnancy so far. I was in much tighter shape before getting pregnant with Shepard, yet gained 6 pounds within the first 16 weeks. This tells me that my body, despite how much diet and exercise I implement, will do what it needs to do to maintain a healthy pregnancy for me and baby.

To illustrate, with both pregnancies, at this stage, I work(ed) out 4-5 days a week, cardio for 20-30 minutes 3-4 days a week and weights for 20-30 minutes a day 4-5 days a week. Prenatal yoga at least once a week starting around 14 weeks and my diet is/was very clean 80% of the week.

What does that 80% mean? 4-5 small meals a day, clean carbs and fats and tons and tons of protein. 1 cup of coffee in the morning and water the rest of the day. Maybe some ice tea (with no sweeteners of any kind). 

I have learned from my own experience, that daily exercise and healthy eating is a must. This doesn't mean you have to deprive yourself of yummy treats or workout like a pro competitor 7 days a week.... everything in moderation! :) Even if its just 30 minutes of a high powered walk everyday or yoga will make the difference and do wonders for your overall physical, mental state and labor. However, talk to your doctor before you do this. I am not a physician and you should get all exercise approved by your doctor. :)